Skip to content

Finding joy in sacrifice

January 12, 2015

A great idea…
“To care about someone does not mean sacrificing one’s time and energy for that person. It means devoting them to the person and taking joy in doing so; in the end, one feels richer for one’s efforts, not poorer.”—Tzvetan Todorov

In other words…
Sacrifice in couple relationships is often overlooked and undervalued. In fact, we often adopt an attitude of:  if you do X, then I will do Y, but as soon as you don’t do X, then all bets are off. This works great when both partners feel that each is contributing equally, but what happens when, for whatever reason, both cannot contribute equally? Sacrifice is needed. Research shows that couples who are willing to serve one another and make sacrifices have happier marriages than those who do not. Instead of focusing on what we can get out of our relationship, let’s focus on what we can give.

How can you apply this…
Think of a time when you sacrificed or offered service to your partner, even if it meant that you missed out on something you wanted for yourself. What satisfaction have you gotten out of this service?

Think about times when your partner has sacrificed his or her preference to serve you. How do you feel about that unselfishness?

Improve your marriage today by dedicating time to serve your spouse.

To Find Out More…
about couple relationships, check out our FREE resources: The Marriage Garden or the Getting Our Hearts Right programs at, follow us at or contact your local county Extension agent. You may also like to read The Marriage Garden book.

Comments are closed.

%d bloggers like this: