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Choose to think differently

April 15, 2013

Here’s a life-changing idea…                                                                                                                          

In his book, Love is Never Enough, Aaron Beck says,
“It is crucial that people recognize that they do have choices—that they are not simply victims of a bad relationship, no matter how hopeless it may seem. They can and should take responsibility for their relationships” (p. 10).

In other words…

Often a relationship is ruined NOT by communication problems, money problems, or intimacy problems. Often it is ruined by the way we THINK about the relationship. When there is conflict, rather than blame our partners, we can be brave enough to take responsibility for our contributions to that conflict. That choice to think about the relationship in ways that accept responsibility may be a key to healthy, vibrant relationships.

Here’s how you can use this idea to have a better life…                                                           

When you find yourself stuck in your relationship, find fresh ways of thinking and acting. Discover things you can do that break out of the old patterns. For example, find ways that your expectations set your partner up for failure—and change those.

To find out more…

check out The Marriage Garden or Getting Our Hearts Right programs at www.arfamilies.org, like us at www.facebook.com/navigatinglife or contact your local county Extension agent. You might also enjoy reading Love is Never Enough.

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