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Manners matter

May 5, 2011
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A Great Idea …

“One of the first things to go in a marriage is politeness. In some ways this simply reflects increasing comfort. But it leads to taking one another for granted, and it can lead to rudeness.” (John Gottman, Ph.D., leading marriage researcher, in his book Why Marriages Succeed or Fail p. 65)

In Other Words …

Graciousness and courtesy help sustain our love. Familiarity can dull our manners. While healthy relationships don’t require us to be artificial, politeness and consideration can smooth many of life’s rough edges.

How This Applies to You …

What are some ways in which you have let politeness with your partner fade? What acts of courtesy and politeness would you like to re-install in your relationship? You could offer thanks for taking out the trash or leave a note of appreciation for doing the laundry. Find a way to show politeness.

To Find Out More …

For an excellent (and free!) program on marriage, see The Marriage Garden at Arkansas Families.

For excellent books focused on marriage, read Why Marriages Succeed or Fail by John Gottman or The Marriage Garden by H. Wallace Goddard and James P. Marshall.

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